i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
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