So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
you never un-have a 4some
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
Randomize
