also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize
