Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Randomize
