there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
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