best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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