Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
