i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
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He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
We left an ass print on the piano.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
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