Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
operation harelip BJ is a go
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
