Will you blow on my dice?
I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
Randomize