There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
