ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
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