What a fucking waste of an outfit
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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