Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
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