ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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