how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
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