just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
it was like having sex with a tree stump
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
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