yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
