Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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