If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
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