I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize
