This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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