his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Randomize
