Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize