so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
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