the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
