I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
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