That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
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