hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
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