so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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