He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize