margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
babies were throwing up all over the place
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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