Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
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