I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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