I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
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I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
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Rumble strips road head = magical
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
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