New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
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