Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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