She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.