Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
