i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
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