Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
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We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
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I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
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