U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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