I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
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