We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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