I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
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