I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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