Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
