i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
