remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
