So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
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