my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
