big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Sext me about skeletons
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
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